The Palin myth: People hate her. 

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Many think a Palin candidacy would be DOA because of her poll numbers. But are those poll numbers a reflection of what people actually have seen of Palin or just a reflection of the portrayal and constant mocking of her over the years? I made the same case for Romney as he was “disliked” in polls by people who had never heard him speak a word. When his poll and favorable poll numbers were low, I reminded people it was a result of both how the media focused on him and the image set by the Obama campaign. But when people actually saw him for the first time in the first debate, a strange thing happened: they liked him. Yep, he was nothing like what voters thought. His favorable numbers rose dramatically, and they were even above 50% by election day. He didn’t win, but a lot more people liked him after they actually saw him than when they expressed an opinion based on a caricature of him. The same could be true with Palin. If anything, the caricature of her is so borderline-silly that most people would be shocked to find out she could recite the alphabet. And how many people think she actually said “I can see Russia from my house”? Palin took a beating far worse than any candidate in recent history. Could she reshape her image? While many memories of the 2008 campaign might have been erased, I’ve noted before that after her 2008 VP acceptance speech, Palin was easily the most popular of the four candidates: 
 
“A week after the selection of Palin, the Republicans would hold their nominating convention and Palin delivered a speech for the ages. Her favorable numbers immediately soared. In fact, her favorable numbers at that point were greater than those of Barack Obama. A CNN Poll had Palin’s favorable ratings at +30 (Obama was +26), Newsweek had Palin at +30 (Obama at +20), and NBC News had Palin at +20 (Obama +21). The McCain-Palin ticket suddenly led Obama-Biden in 7 polls, tied in 3, and trailed in just 2.”
 
In that speech, she went after Obama big time. She was not friendly. She was incredibly likeable and the public approved. It wasn’t until the 2-month media offensive and character assassination (and as just a VP candidate, a relatively small platform with which to respond) did her numbers start to turn. The media set the narrative that she wasn’t experienced enough to be vice-president by constantly writing “Does She Have Enough Experience” pieces. Ironically, while those pieces were written about a governor, mayor, and state commissioner about a VP role, they were never asked of her opposing presidential candidate who was a part-time state legislator and freshman US Senator.
 

Palin is Already Vetted

Finally, Palin is a known commodity. We’ve seen her at her best and her worst. (And her “worst” is more what others have done to her rather than something she has done to herself.) She is very conservative with a populist stretch. She is inclusive. She reaches out to everyone. She is an effective speaker. The media has already investigated every hair on her head, read every email she ever wrote, and even accidentally discovered she was a good governor after all. One thing with Palin is sure: there is nothing left to be vetted except her ideas. Would Palin be a risky move? Well, how did the last two guys work out for us and who among the Republicans would be a better force to at least try to stomp her opponent the way they will stomp back?

 

Chances are unlikely that Sarah Palin will run in 2016, but if all of the top conservatives choose to sit out, it’s still a possibility.

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Proof that the Pagan Gods/Goddesses exist.

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When it comes to people’s beliefs and faiths, there are many arguments on which faith is the ‘real’ or the ‘one true’ faith. However, no one can actually prove that one faith is actually the ‘one’. And with the world dominated by Christians (and Christians being the religious folk who tried to snuff out most other religions), it seems that they have found themselves in the “we’re the followers of the real religion” group.

Majority of people totally disregard the pagan (or older) faiths. However, after some seriously hard thinking, I have come up with proof that the Greek Gods/Goddesses actually exist – and still do.

This is my argument of their existence. And it’s an argument based on design.

1. Gazelles are perfectly designed for running away from lions.
2. Lions are perfectly designed for chasing gazelles.
3. This design cannot happen by chance.
4 . Therefore, the design of lions and gazelles must be the result of intervention by an intelligent agent.
5. Gazelles and lions are each designed to thwart the design of the other (from 1 and 2)
7. Therefore, gazelles and lions had seperate designers competing against one another.
8. Grapes are perfectly designed to be useful to make wine out of.
9. What has this to do with gazelles and lions?
10. Therefore, there was yet another designer who made grapes.
11. Therefore, Dionysus.
12. There are also lots of other designers (from 7)
13. Therefore, the rest of the Olympian gods exist.

So that’s my argument of their existence based on natural design 👍

Basic ‘how to’ for a relationship.

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These are just a few basic pointers that could support you in your relationship. I’m no expert, but it doesn’t take Aphrodite to have some common sense 😉

  1. Don’t fall asleep angry, ever. If you do happen to fall asleep after an argument, if you wake up in the middle of the night, hold him/her close. A silent apology.
  2. It’s OK to laugh during sex! If you bang heads, laugh! Have fun with it. If there’s no laughter between you both, then you’re with the wrong person.
  3. Dance naked together. Be naked together. If you don’t feel comfortable showing your partner your lumps and bumps, then you’re with the wrong guy/gal.
  4. Being romantic isn’t for everyone – believe me! But a post-it note in your partner’s coat, or a note on the pillow after you’ve left for work telling them you love them/miss them will never go amiss.
  5. Don’t cling to them when you’re out. Dance with your friends, mingle with people – but send them the odd cheeky wink from across the room.
  6. Keep everything 50/50 or you will both fall out of balance with each other.
  7. Never compare your relationship to others. You are you, don’t try to be someone else.
  8. Be kind. Give them space when they need it, but be their home when they come back.
  9. Be proud to love them.
  10. Support them through everything they do/want to do in life – even the stupid decisions or far away dreams. People need to make their own mistakes, but be there for them if it does all fall – and never say ‘I told you so’.

But most of all, love the with all your heart, or don’t love them at all.

Imperfection is perfection

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Recently I have been getting into the series RuPaul’s Drag Race. It’s something I would never usually watch, mainly because I’m not into all the camp gay things that are spilling onto the television of late.

However, someone asked me to watch it, so I thought I would give it a chance.

Drag Queens are bizarre. I’ve never really fully understood them if I’m honest. And I don’t fully understand them now, though the show has given me a lot of insight into why they do what they do.

These gals (men), come from all different backgrounds, cultures and different sexualities. Because let’s not assume all drag queens are gay – take for example Dame Edna Everage.

With the time we live in, people are becoming a lot more accepting – that’s a fact. However, there is a still a lot of negativity flying around. From watching RuPaul’s Drag Race I could see some of the hardship these gals had to go through, and it got to me.

People aren’t perfect. No one is. We all have our little imperfections that make us who we are. But if we don’t fall into this ‘cookie cutter’ image, we’re not accepted by society.

People enjoy finding your imperfections and using them against you. Well, you know what? I like everyone’s imperfections.

Personally, I think that freckles, stretch marks, bruises, tattoos and scars are the coolest things ever. You start out as a blank canvas, and now look at you. All these things are evidence that you’ve lived, fallen, picked yourself back up or maybe liked an image so much that you’ve made it a permanent part of your body.

Everyone is beautiful. You’re imperfections make you perfect.

Wilful ignorance.

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I’m going to give you some of the secrets about how marketers make you buy what they want you to buy. So, as a marketer, when they’re first given a project, what’s their job? Well, their job is to make you want it, to crave it, to need it, to think that it is the best innovation in food since sliced bread.

How do they do it? Well, I’m going to give a really big example later that I’m going to break right down for you, but let’s just start by looking at a few fun little things.

See here we have Shreddies, an old favorite, been around for years. Very popular in the U.K. and Canada.

shreddies_ps

Without changing a single little thing about that product they remarketed them, rebranded them as brand-new diamond-shaped Shreddies. Food marketing genius right there.

shreddies-ooh-02

 

In the 1950s, there was a very important innovation in food: the instant-mix cake. One of my personal favorites. When they were first brought out all you needed to do was to add a little bit of water. Who’s not going to love that? Well, actually, no one loved it. No one bought the bloody thing, so they did a little bit of research. And what they found was that the main consumer, the target consumer, the housewife, felt that it was cheating.

They didn’t want to pass off such an easy thing as their own baking to their partners, their husbands, their families, whatever. So what did the producers have to do? They had to make it harder. So now you had to add water and an egg, and sales exploded.

These examples, these are just chicken feed compared to what I really want to talk about in this post and that is: chickens, and pigs, and cows. So when we think about where chickens, etc. come from, we think about something like this:

chicken-on-field

That’s also our instinctive idea, but we all know if we really think about it deeply, it’s probably a little bit more like that, but that’s a lot nicer. It’s a lot more romantic.

So how do they give you this impression? Well, there are three techniques that they use, the third of which is their secret weapon, and I am going to blow it for you in a minute, so please stay primed for that.

Let’s look at technique number one. Everybody believes what’s on the label. So let’s look at some examples, some of my favorite, some of the ones they use all the time. They’ll use farm fresh. They’ll use 100 percent natural. They’ll use butcher’s choice. But what does that really actually mean?

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Well, truthfully, it doesn’t mean very much. We see that on the label, we feel a bit more confident. But let’s have a look at what a farm really looks like. It probably looks like this:

Florida_chicken_house

Now this is a concentrated animal feeding operation. I’m going to run that past you again. It’s a concentrated animal feeding operation. That’s not going to look great on a label, hence they use farm fresh.

Innovation number two. This is what they use: they focus on progress. Intensive farming was born out of necessity. At the end of the second World War, resources were extremely tight. Farming had to be by necessity very, very economical and we’ve learnt from that and we’ve built from that, and we’re able to now raise more and more animals in smaller and smaller spaces. So we got extremely good at it.

If we looked at an everyday lecture hall and turned it into a chicken barn . . . it’s a hundred-seat theater. How many chickens could we probably fit in this room now? I’m going to say about 4,000. It’s pretty impressive, isn’t it? It’d probably look a little bit like this:

Chicken breeding for Wiesenhof poultry farming

Now, the public aren’t going to be massively keen on that idea.

It’s the marketer’s job to make them feel a little bit better about it. So how do they do it? Well, a basic principle of marketing. They use the right choice of words, and by using the right choice of words they can make the conversation, they can focus the conversation the way they want it to.

So we’ll use an example of this.

Screen Shot 2014-06-09 at 23.24.31

When you look at that picture, where is your eye drawn? It’s drawn right to the middle of the page, massive letters. We’ve got: strive to optimize. What we’re looking at in the picture in reverse looks a bit like that. But this looks a lot nicer because we’re looking at strive to optimize. It makes us feel there’s progress. We feel good.

So the challenge for the marketers is to make the public feel comfortable about what they’re seeing. One of the side effects of intensive farming, of having so many animals in such a small space, unfortunately, is obviously disease because if you put so many animals into a small space they’re going to get sick. It is no secret that 50 percent of all the antibiotics in the world are used on farmed animals.

So how do you make the public feel okay with this? How does that happen? Marketer’s job. How do they do it? They use the language of innovation. So we’re going back to our old friends at porkcares.org, and what they do is they say, “As farming has . . . become more efficient, veterinarians have incorporated new technologies and methods into practice.” This makes us feel good. This is positive.

So on to their secret weapon! This is what we really need to focus on. So these two techniques alone, they are not going to work. They need a secret weapon, number three. It is actually in the room right now with you. Secret weapon.

It is you.

So how do they do it? When you’re in the supermarket, you don’t want to think about where those products come from. You don’t want to think about how those animals have been reared, how they’ve been treated. The power of willful ignorance cannot be overstated. This is systemized cruelty on a massive scale and they only get away with it because everyone is prepared to look the other way.

Your wilful ignorance allows animal cruelty to continue on mass scales.

Time To Leave

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One stares into darkness with no hope of life,
dreaming it will end with the roll of a dice,
As the ground trembles, moves and quakes,
my painful heart begins to ache.
With the light of dawn fail and fall,
the bell of death begins to call.
As my lonely soul begins to weep,
the thought of drifting away in my sleep,
unbarring, unkind, painful and sore.
I beg to god to let me go,
knowing there’s no other door.
The time has come to close my eyes,
swallow the pills and hope to die.

A prayer to Aphrodite.

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Unsurpassed goddess, with love and awe I greet you.
Sea-green are your eyes, luminous and fathomless;
flawless is your form. O wondrous Aphrodite,
of water were you born, in water we know you–
in soft waves of pleasure, in torrents of desire,
in salt tears of lost love, in salt sweat at love’s end.
So sweet your gifts, goddess, unbearably sweet,
so sharp their agony, so thin the line between.
For love that fills the soul; for life-giving passion;
for pure, clear, beautiful lust-maddened hearts;
for solace and hope; for love’s comfort and terror:
O Aphrodite, for your blessings I thank you.

Why English is so difficult to learn!

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We’ll begin with box; the plural is boxes,

but the plural of ox is oxen, not oxes.

One foul is a goose, and two are called geese,

Yet the plural of moose is never meese.

You may find a lone mouse or a house full of mice,

But the plural of house is houses, not hice.

The plural of man is men,

but the plural of pan is never pen.

 

If I speak of a foot, and you show me two feet,

and I give you a book, would a pair be a beek?

If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,

why shouldn’t two booths be called a beeth?

 

If the singular’s this and the plural is these,

should the plural of kiss be ever called keese?

 

We speak of a brother and also of brethren,

but though we say mother, we never say methren.

 

Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him,

but imagine the feminine… she, shis, and shim!

Farewell, Possums!

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edna-6259313Gladioli loving, bespectacled housewife Dame Edna Everage has been one of the nation’s much loved superstars for more than five decades.

So it seems only fitting that fans of the Australian favourite are granted an audience with her as she prepares to bow out of the limelight. That’s right, Barry Humphries announced in March 2012 that he would retire the Gigastar has he was now beginning to feel ‘a bit senior’.

As the curtain rises, we find ourselves on the set of Sir Les’ pilot TV series – Les Get Cookin’. And while he may now be swapping politics for life as a celebrity chef, he’s still the obese, lecherous and offensive figure we’ve all come to know.

Wearing orange shorts and a Hawaiian shirt straining over his bulging belly, Sir Les sprays the front rows with saliva as he talks us through his recipe for rissoles. He also spends much of his time ogling his long-legged female assistants or belching and letting off ‘trouser coughs’.

Boldly telling any sticklers for political correctness exactly what they should do, Sir Les is as near to the knuckle as he’s ever been with his toilet humour as well as sexist, racist and homophobic jibes. Classic Patterson!

The second act is devoted to Dame Edna and after black and white grainy film footage telling her life story, she arrives on stage on a mechanical elephant.

With a perfectly coiffed purple bouffant and wearing a sparkling turquoise gown, she reveals she’s spent time in an ashram as she’s turning her back on the celebrity-obsessed world.

There’s plenty of audience participation with those in the front rows being the target once more.

The show was not a disappointment in the slightest. Dame Edna Everage is, and will always be, a Nation’s favourite. She will always be a household name here in the United Kingdom.

The personal touches that Humphries added to each tour (naming Splott in Cardiff and various other parts of Cardiff), just made it feel like Dame Edna was coming to this city to see ‘us’ and no one else. A very homely feel indeed.

The mass gladioli-waving was a highlight for sure! Dame Edna hurled roughly 50-60 Gladioli into the audience and had them following her ‘Gladdi’ dance as she sang the show to an end – even stopping mid song when one audience member had her Gladdi pointing the wrong way!

A series of holograms of all of Humphries’ characters bidding farewell is a lovely touch at the end – before the man himself steps onto the stage to rapturous applause, saying: “You will come to my next farewell tour, won’t you?”

We will all be there, I assure you!

So you think YOUR job sucks?

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You think your job sucks? Let me tell you about the people I work with.

First, there’s this supermodel wanna-be chick. Ok, I’ll admit, she’s pretty hot, but damn she is completely useless. The girl is constantly fixing her hair or putting on her makeup. She is extremely self centered and never considers the needs of anyone other than herself. She is dumber than a box of rocks and I find it surprising that she has enough brain power to breathe.

The next chick is exactly the opposite- she might even be one of the smartest girls on the planet. She has endless career opportunities but she’s still here with us. She is a zero on a scale of 1 to 10. I doubt she even showers, much less shaves her “womanly” parts. I think she might be a lesbian, because every time we drive past the hardware store she moans like a cat in heat.

But the jewel of the crowd has got to be the fucking stoner. And this guy is more than just your average pothead. The guy is baked before he comes to work, after work, and even during work. He probably hasn’t been sober any time in the last 10 years, and he’s only 22. He dresses like a beatnik throwback from the 1960’s, and, to make things worse, brings his fucking giant dog to work. Every fucking day I have to look at this huge Great Dane walking around half stoned from the second-hand smoke. Hell, sometimes I even think it’s trying to talk with its constant bellowing. Also, both of them are constantly hungry, requiring multiple stops to McDonald’s and Burger King every single fucking day.

Anyways, I drive these fucktards around in my van and we solve mysteries and shit.